"Graduation"

Me: (Sets down soapbox and climbs on- begins to rant) 

Sorry, folks, you don't graduate from middle school. You finish it, you complete it, you move on, you pass it, all of those things, but you don't GRADUATE. The diploma they give you is made up and will get you zero credit in the real world when applying for jobs or college or anything. You worked hard, and we are proud of you, and you deserve a party, but not a GRADUATION party... 

Also me: (Watches my baby walk onto the stage in a cap and gown to receive academic honors medals in all three available categories and then ultimately, a fake diploma. Jumps off of soapbox.)

Look! Look! My little girl is graduating! She's amazing! I'm so proud! She's graduating!!! Look at all these graduates graduating!!!