Empty Threats

One of the rules of effective discipline is to never threaten a consequence that you aren't willing and ready to follow through with. If you do, the kids figure out pretty quick that they don't really have to worry about what you may say, they can go ahead and do what they want.

I have always tried to follow this rule, but today Rose turned into a little demon, and I came very close to running out of consequences that I was actually willing to enforce. As the showdown escalated, I had to try very hard not to make empty threats, because it was pretty obvious that she was going to earn each and every consequence I laid down.

Rose, however, was not tied down by any qualms about being able to back up what she said. Here are some of the threats she flung at me when I wouldn't back down. She started with the classic "That's it! You're not my mom anymore!" and quickly escalated into the absurd and wildly fantastic.

"I am maybe even going to live in Antarctica. And when I come back to visit, I will hit you in the head with a piece of ice. I will wait till a sunny day loosens some, then I will pick it up and bring it for a visit. And then BAM!"

"Do you want me to break your bed? I'll get a saw and cut it up!"

"Do you want me to move to outer space? I am going to build a space ship and go. I will!"

"You aren't allowed to pick me up from school anymore!"

"Do you want me to take away your black chair from your room and put it in my room? I'll move the shelves and put it in my book nook. Then I will get some glue and stick it on the ceiling. And when it dries I will get a ladder and climb up, and I will be tiny, so I can fit into it. And only John and I will share it."

"Do you want me to glue your face to a light bulb? Then your eyes will really hurt! And it's going to be gorilla glue!"

I am happy to say that none of these threats were carried out. In fact, we were even friends again before she went to bed. I have John to thank for that. After I refused to let Rose eat gummy bears for dinner she told me she hated me. John leaned over and whispered in my ear "Everybody hates you." It was too much, I started laughing. Rose asked what he had said and when I told her, good old reverse psychology kicked in, and she proclaimed "No! I love her!"

It's good to be loved.